Shock

When I saw you a month ago I had no idea in the next you would die.
When I was here a month ago for one funeral I never imagined I'd return soon after for another. There has been to much death, to much change, to much of everything I can't control recently. There is no going back to the way it was. But I'd at least like to return to some degree of normalcy again. 

Day Work

So five days in of eight days in a row is how I decided to make my return to working daywork. Eight days with on average ten calls a shift, some sick, some dying and plenty of misuse and abuse. What stands out was A three year old hit by a car, but the memorable part was the hot dog  his mouth. Who gets hit by a car eating a hot dog? And what family member chooses to say "they are great hot dogs" as the child is lying in paramedics hands. All this and more happens working the 'hood. 

Three more days to go, and while I struggle to adapt to daylight, the real struggle is adapting to life without the partner I shared 40-50 hours a week for the last two and a half years with.

Fresh Start

4/7/2011

We attended orientation to this job together. We were presented our academy class flag together as the "oldest and youngest." And now as of 0800 tomorrow we will be partners. Not of our own choosing but let's make the best of it. We have a lot of common ground, but also plenty ground to bridge. We've worked together before but working together daily will be different. Let's give it a fresh start and see what good comes of however long were together.

Back Where It Began

3/11/2011

Back Where It Began

I must have spent thousands of hours on these streets as a paramedic student. I showered in back garage shower, slept on the floor in stations only built for one.  Saw a flock new hires for a new truck. All for the glory of learning this job, and earning my patch. Then after being released to take my tests never returned. Then several weeks ago I got offered the chance to return to this little city in a PRN position. I still love my full time job, my partner and my local beneath the skyline. But there is a great deal of nostalgia riding these streets again. Because this is the department where I earned my nickname, and where I learned to be a paramedic.

Sitting in the station on my second orientation shift I crossed paths with one of my preceptors who's now a local cop. He's is the reason I always have a radio with me, and wear it the way he did. I don't always find this job easy but owe it to people like him who dedicated so much time to me to continue to do this job and do it well. Seeing that he admires the fact that I'm doing it where I am to makes it count even more.

So I'm back at least a few times a month where it all began and looking forward to see what's to come down here.

"In The Time Of Her Death"

So I'm sitting here in Midway airport waiting to go home twirling my grandfathers cane, and rose petal I took off the head of a rose. The rest of the rose sits on top of my grandmothers coffin. There both gone now, six years apart since my grandfathers death and now they are finally together in heaven. 

As 1516 Judson Street was burning and Firefighters were fighting and falling during that battle my phone rang unanswered in my pants pocket beneath my fire gear with news that my grandmother had died. Her death was expected and really welcome as death brings an end to the suffering from Leukemia. 

Tomorrow night when I return to work and the streets of Philadelphia I'll try and carry her simple grace and patience with me. Things I often lack in the trauma and drama of street medicine.